


Don't Try To Save Me.

by Small_Town_Wayward_Daughter



Category: The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Aftermath of Torture, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-16
Updated: 2016-07-18
Packaged: 2018-07-24 08:04:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,632
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7500516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Small_Town_Wayward_Daughter/pseuds/Small_Town_Wayward_Daughter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Winter Soldier made you, Now Bucky wants to save you.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! I hope you like it! <3
> 
> Story is written from Bucky's POV.

_"Really? You were just here." She said in a weak voice, her hair was plastered to her head with sweat and she was eyeing me warily. "Are you ever gonna tell me your name oh mighty torturer?" She asked in a scathing tone and I just gave her a blank stare. I walked closer to her and she tried not to show the fear that she felt but I saw it anyway. I always saw. I had started electrocution torture today and I think it was beginning to work. Today would be the day she broke after weeks of working on her. Hearing her cry out, scream and seeing her writhe on the table as I pressed the electric wand against her. "Ok! Please I'll cooperate please just- just stop!" She gasped and I pulled the wand away from her.  
"About damn time." I muttered and punched her in the face to knock her._  
  
I sat up and let out a strangled breath she was haunting me, the girl with the dark hair. I think her eyes were blue but I couldn't tell since the room in the dream was always so dark. Well I wish it was a dream but I think that it might be a terrible memory. The things I did to her, the person that I made her, out of all the things I have done that is what made me feel like a monster the most. I woke up hearing her screams in my head every night and I was sick of it. I had to find her. I told Steve and Nat about my dreams but they both thought she was a 'manifestation of my guilt' they thought she wasn't real.They thought that my mind had made her up but I knew that wasn't possible, she was so pure or she had been. Right? I had to know, I couldn't live with myself if she was real and I left her there to endure more pain. I was still deciding in the planning stages of how to go about this when I woke up from another dream and had reached my limit, I left a note for Steve, told him I was going on a personal mission and not to worry, packed a bag, and headed out. I had to sneak into what used to be a few Hydra bases before I found the one I was looking for. I'd been traveling for a month when things started to look familiar to me. I remembered the set up of this base and from there I knew exactly where to go. It was to easy for me to sneak into the base and avoid the guards as I went. I crept down a hallway and paused outside her cell door. I heard a guard coming so I crept inside the room and heard a familiar laugh behind me.   
"Really? You again Winter? I thought you were free." I turned and looked at her. She was more disarming then I remembered, her eyes were blue and her hair was short now but still brown. I looked at her for a minute, took in her battered face and her haunted expression.   
"I am free. Now it's your turn." I walked towards her and she flinched as I reached out to free her hands.   
"Don't." I looked at her.   
"Don't?"   
"I-I can't be free from here, I don't know how to be free anymore. Just leave me, The torture is getting easier to take." She sounded frantic and I reached out to touch her face with my flesh hand.  
"It's ok, all that is over now. Let me free you, I'll take you home with me." She let out a cold laugh and glared at me.   
"I am like this because of you! You did this to me mighty Winter Soldier and now you want to free me?"   
"No, That wasn't me, I didn't want to do that to you. I was programmed to obey commands and that was what you were, a mission. A command to be obeyed. I'm not like that anymore. I'm _so_ sorry." She looked at me for a minute and then shook her head.   
"It doesn't matter. I belong here now Winter. Leave me here and get out." I shook my head and used my metal hand to pull her restraints off her wrists and ankles.   
"I won't leave you ever again. Please come with me."  
"Why? You don't even know my name." She hadn't moved so I pulled her into a sitting position and she rubbed her wrists.   
"Then tell me, I want to know. Let me help you please."   
"F/N. They will be coming soon to start on me again, I refused a mission and now I'm being punished, they keep talking about 'wiping me' what is that?"   
"We need to go. Now." I tugged her off the table, out of her cell and down the hall.   
"Freeze!" I heard about fifteen guns cock and sighed. I turned and saw the hallway behind us full of armed men and I tugged F/N behind me.   
"When I tell you to, run." I felt her nod and I held up my arms in surrender. Before I opened my mouth the power was cut, I felt F/N grip my shirt and I reached out to touch her so she wouldn't freak out. I heard the sound of fists and metal hitting flesh and then the lights clicked back on.   
"Personal mission huh?" Steve was standing in the middle of a group of unconscious men and Nat came running around the corner.   
"Ready to go boys? and girl?" She looked at F/N and I felt her hand grip my metal hand. I looked at her and gave her a reassuring smile.  
"It's ok. They are the good guys I promise." She looked at me and nodded. "Will you stay with Nat while I take the lead to get us out of here?" She looked at the ground and nodded. I let her go and started to move forward about three turns later she spoke.  
"Stop." I turned to look at her and she was looking at the next hallway we needed to go down. "There are armed men down there, a lot of them."  
"How do you know?" Steve asked and she looked at him with glowing blue eyes.   
"I can see them." I nodded and looked at Steve.   
"Ready?" Before he could reply she manifested a glowing blue ball in her hands and threw it down the hallway. The men started screaming and when we looked around the corner they were all laying on the ground pulsing with electricity.  
"That's useful." Nat muttered and I just stared at her.   
"I'm so sorry." I put my head in my hands as I felt grief swamp me. They used what made her weak to make her a weapon. She took my metal hand in hers and shook her head.   
"It wasn't you remember? We need to go they will send more." We took off at a run and once we were outside we hauled ass back to the jet. She looked overwhelmed as she stepped inside so I tugged her over to sit with me.   
"Buckle up." Steve and Nat sat across the aisle giving us room but still close enough to help if she freaked out. Not that I needed it.   
"Why?" She turned to face me after she buckled up.  
"In case the plane-"  
"No. Why did you come?" I sighed and looked away from her.   
"You've been haunting my dreams for months and I was tired of hearing you scream, I had to see if you were real. If I could help you. I had to know." I looked at her out of the corner of my eye.   
"Thank you." She whispered and she took my hand in hers again. "I'm holding you to that whole not leaving me alone thing." I smirked and nodded at her. Things were going to get interesting around the Tower.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As requested by rogue_undomiel14, I give you chapter 2!

"Damn it F/N! stop throwing your power balls at me." Tony shouted at her from across the training room. I smirked when she flipped him off and threw another little energy orb at him.  
"You told me my aim sucked on moving targets Tony, I thought that meant you wanted to help me." She told him in an innocent tone. I knew that tone that was her I'm bored and you are my entertainment voice.  
"Go bug your assassin boyfriend and leave me alone, I'm trying to set up a training simulation for the 90 year old virgin." She sighed at him, flicked one more orb towards him and left the room.   
"He's not my boyfriend by the way!" She yelled and I saw Tony roll his eyes at her. She had been living at the tower for about two months now, she still had nightmares but hell so did I. I kept my door unlocked and most mornings I would wake up and she would be sleeping beside me and I loved it when I woke up to her. Her face had lost that gaunt appearance but her eyes were still haunted. She was less on edge and only shocked about one person a week out of fear instead of one every few hours. Her and I were in a weird place, we held hands, cuddled, and were very close to each other but we never kissed or did anything that would take this to the next level. Hearing her say that I wasn't her boyfriend gave me a pang and I realized that was what I wanted to be. I left the training room and went looking for her. I saw her on the balcony looking out at the city, she told me that the one thing she had missed being kept at Hydra was the outside.   
I slid open to door and joined her. Her hair was getting longer and was soft and shiny as the sun reflected off of it. It looked like warm melted chocolate and I had never seen anyone with the same color of hair before.   
"Hey." I murmured and she turned to smile at me.   
"Hi Bucky." I put my arm around her and we watched the view together for a while.   
"Wanna watch a movie?" I asked her and she nodded at me. "You pick, I just wanna hang out with you."   
"Are you sure you want me to pick? Last time picked we watched a cartoon and you cried."  
"His dad got killed in a stampede! He was just a little lion cub! I refuse to feel bad about getting upset over that." I muttered and I felt my face heat up.   
"Oh James, you are just to great you know that?" I looked at her. Now or never Barnes.   
"Great enough to be your fella?" I asked her and she looked at me out of the corner of her eye.   
"Too great, you could do better." She tried to pull away but I didn't let her. I knew what she thought of herself and I knew that it was bull, she was amazing.  
"That's not what I asked doll."   
"Yeah great enough for that Bucky." I smiled and leaned over to kiss her cheek.   
"Great now, lets go watch that movie huh?" She nodded and tugged me inside.  
  
  
"Bucky you gotta get back to the jet, I'll be there in a minute." I heard her voice in my ear. I heard the panic and the lie in her tone even though she tried to sound fine. It had been a year since I found her, nine months that we had been together and six months since she was ready to go on missions with us. I had mixed feelings about bringing her on this one and I knew that this might've been too much for her.   
"I'm almost to you hold on for me F/N." I wasn't leaving without her, never again I promised her.  
"I can blow this place up but not with you in it. _Please_ James just go." Bringing her back to this base was a mistake. We were back where our story began, that same base, same floor, same fear that oozed off of her and made me mad because she had come so far since then. I burst into the control room and looked at the guard she had taken out there must've been 25 of them and she looked exhausted. I knew she would be able to take out the base but not without killing herself.   
"Doll, F/N, please don't do this." She looked at me with dazed eyes and tilted her head.   
"I have to, I have to bring this place down James." I shook my head at her.   
"No you already have baby, please, you have over come this place a thousand times over. You know you have and if you blow up this building it wont make a difference, because you are already healed." She shook her head and looked at me with anger.  
"How do you know that Bucky? I have nightmares, I am this- this monster-" She motioned to the men on the ground around her. "Because of this place and yet you tell me that I've overcome it, that I am healed." She laughed a cold laugh and just looked at me. "How do you know?"  
"Because I can see the changes in you. I love you F/N and I promised that I would never leave you alone again so go ahead. Blow it up but if you're going then I am going too." I heard Steve's voice then Nat's in my ear telling me not to be an idiot but I ignored them.   
"You have to leave Buck." I shook my head and walked over to take her hand in my metal one.   
"Together F/N or not at all." I said, my voice laced with finality and I saw her resolve crumble. Her eyes welled up and she buried her face in my chest.   
"I just want to be me again Bucky." She said against my chest and I wrapped my arms around her.   
"You are you, just a newer version Doll. You know that deep down." She nodded. "Lets go home huh?"   
"Ok." She let me lead her out and to the jet. Steve and Nat were giving me proud parent looks and I just smiled softly. She curled up on the seat next to me and I covered her with my jacket after she fell asleep. Using her power made her tired and then she got hungry and god help anyone who stood between her and food. Tony and Sam learned that the hard way and with an energy orb to the butt. I looked at her sleeping face and smiled softly. I had ended up with the girl- literally- of my dreams and I couldn't believe how lucky I was for that. Yeah she was a little broken but so was I and her broken pieces fit with mine perfectly. I felt eyes on my and I looked up at a grinning Steve. I looked at him and mouthed 'what?'  
'You love her' he said back and I gave him a look.  
'Watch yourself punk' I mouthed at him and he just smirked.   
'We're the same size now Buck that don't work anymore.' I raised a brow at him and he just cleared his throat and looked away. I smirked and settled into my seat. F/N stirred and gripped my metal hand in hers, I ran my hand through her hair and she muttered.   
"Love you Buck"   
"Love you too Doll."


End file.
